An Inconvenient Commute

Each morning we New York Citorians (yes I did make up my own word because I'm from New York City and I can do what I want) come together to make the morning commute. It's slow, uncomfortable and obnoxious. Most morning’s people are cranky and rude, pushing up against one another, yelling profanities and trying to avoid the homeless men that are still sleeping in those much coveted seats. Every work week I watch people forget common decency and resort to their primal instincts. The instincts that were found before large fast moving silver bullets containing mass amounts of people were ever invented.

If you have ever ridden the MTA at 8 o'clock in the morning you know those people to look out for. These people that slow down the already slow commute include:

1. The person who is standing by the door and will not budge. No matter how hard you try to push by them they are making a point of holding fast and meshing their bodies to the side of the railing.
2. The person who thinks they are so quick that once the doors open they can slide in and get a seat before anyone else has had a chance to get off.
3. The group of people who have decided that they have found a place to stand that is comfortable and no matter how many times those doors open and close they will not move. They are much like person number one except they band together and make sure that the people getting off and on will have to move around them and their unfunny friends.
4. The boyfriend and girlfriend who stand together next to the doors groping each other, giggling and other general public display's off abomination. They will most likely hit you with their hands, legs or bags more than a few times before you get off the train or find a better spot to stand far away from them.
5. The smelly person who is mostly found during the summer months. This is the person that stands right above you, when you are lucky enough to get a seat, and obviously hasn't showered or ever heard the word deodorant. This is the person that raises their arms but somehow can't see, feel or smell the massive sweat stains with aroma on their shirts.
6. The parents, I'm pretty sure these are just about the worse commuters out there. They do not teach their children public transportation etiquette instead they let them stand anywhere they want, they hold them and look at you like you should be ashamed you didn't give their grimy little runt your seat. They make loud cooing noises, run over your things with their monstrous strollers and let their children climb all over you. Sometimes it's just unbelievable!
7. The massive group of young teenagers. They are loud, obnoxious and find everything funny. There's not much more than you can say about them except their parents did NOT teach them proper commuting techniques (see above).


So when you find yourself in line waiting to get on and you see all of these people in one car, which believe me has been know to happen before, just remember everyone has experienced this at one time or another and we all roll our eyes, plug in our earphones and crank the music as loud as it will go. Because honestly what else can you do when you need to get to work?